PA - Antoon (Antonius)
  • Honest hard worker, yet often accused by his wife of whore mongering
    • Pa op Jonkerbos
    		BORN: 25/03/1909 (Den Haag)
    DIED: 26/07/1987 (Nijmegen)

    A good-humoured and hard working man, dedicated to his wife and family. Always ready for a joke.

    Labeled by Trudy as "A violent man". Other sisters have a similar mindset.

    Antoon often waited for him to come home at night, and prepared sliced fried potato (with light brown crust on both sides) for him (Antoon's specialty). And/or a snack from the slow-cooker pan (beef).

    From time to time he asked Antoon to go out and buy a packet of cigarettes (Caballero) and gave him one guilder, of which he could keep the change.
    De werkplaats (workplace)
    		Even in winter he had to install tomb-stones in the snow and ice. Antoon remembers well, as a child he often accompanied Pa on such jobs with Piet Tournij (de knecht).

    Otherwise, many weekends and evenings were spent doing bookkeeping and other administration.

    Having been in business himself for many years, Antoon has a good reality on that.
    De klaagmuur (whaling wall) designed and constructed by Pa.
    		Pa did many renovations to the house on the Berg en Dalseweg.

    This wall project took a massive amount of time and patience (later, the new owners demolished it).

    Not long afterwards Pa was forced to sell the house, because (again) Ma refused to discuss any important issues.
    From time to time Pa put all of us in the car and went to visit places. Visiting his sister Tante Annie in Hilversum and Tante Stiena is also remembered.

    Pa did not relate well with Ma's family, and later the reasons were understood. Like Ma, her family were rather anti-social and seemingly siding with Ma on any differences. Antoon recalls only an occasional visit to Ma's brother (Ome Jan in Utrecht) who was rather depressed and was telling him he wanted "een kraakje plegen".

    Once or twice Antoon visited another sister from Ma in Den Bosch (antiek shop). Antoon still remembers long faces...

    Later Pa had the opportunity to buy a partly completed house in 'Mook' but Ma refused to sign the necessary documents. Antoon still hears her say while sitting in the lazy sofa "Ik zit hier goed" (I am fine here).

    Not very supportive of her husband and his ambitions.

    At one time Pa immigrated to New Zealand after a lot of help from Trudy and Topy, and bought a house close to Topy (same street as Roland) with Hans living with him. Unfortunately, he wasn't happy in his new environment (very different culture, not too good with the English language) and returned to the Netherlands a while later, being pissed off with losses on the exchange rates.

    Back in the Netherlands, when Pa developed health issues, he was forced into a nursing home against his will and protests. In many other cultures he would have been living with one of his children or another relative.


    Pa often used to read the newspaper at the table.
    Hallo hallo wie stinkt er zo... Paatje voor de radio.

    If with pleasure you are viewing
    Any work a man is doing;
    If you like him or you love him, tell him now.
    Don't withhold your approbation
    Till the parson makes oration
    And he lies with snowy lillies o'er his brow.

    For no matter how you shout it,
    He won't really care about it;
    He won't know how many teardrops you have shed.
    If you think some praise is due him,
    Now's the time to slip it to him,
    For he cannot read his tombstone when he's dead.     		More than fame and more than money
    Is the comment kind and sunny,
    And the hearty warm approval of a friend;
    For it gives to life a savor,
    and it makes you strong, braver.
    And it gives you heart and spirit to the end.

    If he earns your praise, bestow it;
    If you like him, let him know it.
    Let the words of true encouragement be said;
    Do not wait till life is over,
    And he's underneath the clover.
    For he cannot read his tombstone when he's dead.



    Ter herinnering aan ANTOON VERPLAK

    geboren 25 maart 1909 te 's-Gravenhage, onverwacht van ons heengegaan 26 juli 1987. Zijn lichaam is begraven op de begraafplaats Jonkerbos te Nijmegen op 30 juli d.a.v.

    Antoon was een man, kunstzinnig en zeer ondernemend, die een leven achter zich heefd van hard werken in deze wereld. Zijn handen waren altijd bezig iets niews te scheppen op velerlei gebied. Waren het niet de vele grafstenen, die onder zijn handen zijn gekomen, dan was het wel het doen ontstaan van een groootse bloemenpracht. Dit laatste was een van zijn meest geliefde bezigheden. Ook het gaan zien van de wereld, waarin hij woonde, was iets wat hem boeide. Vrienden hebben hem gekend als een bijznder hartelijk man. Hij heeft leven geschonken aan zijn zes kinderen, die dan ook dankbaar zijn, hem als zorgzame vader gehad te hebben. Een ieder gelijke kansen geven, was een kenmerk, dat ook zijn kinderen nooit zullen vergeten.
    Sprak over 'la solitude' in latere stadia van zijn leven.
    De laaste jaren woonde hij in Huize St.Joachim en Anna, waar hij liefdevol verzorgd werd. In deze tijd heeft hij zich al een beetje losgemaakt van dit leven. Zijn lichaam wilde niet meer zo; kon datgene wat in hem leefde, niet meer tot uitdrukking brengen. Nu is hij niet langer gebonden aan dat lichaam. Hij is weer vrij; de gang door de aardse sfeer is voltooid.
    Laat onze liefde hem begeleiden op zijn weg naar zijn werelden. Het leed, dat wij hebben, bemoeilijkt voor hem, die van ons is heengegaan, het bestaan in de sfeer, waarin hij moet binnentreden. Uw liefde, daarentegen, werkt voor hem als een soort kleed van vleugels, dat hem opwaarts draagt.

    In Christus sterven wij.

    Je glimlachte en sprak tegen mij over niets
    en ik voelde dat dit het was waarop ik lang gewacht had.

    Voor Uw medeleven is de familie U zeer dankbaar.


    FOOTNOTE:
    Bidprentjes are a Roman Catholic tradition. Pa was no Roman Catholic. Aside from that, the last few paragraphs do not reflect Pa's thoughts.
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    the verplak family